tawni

Hi I'm new here and my name is Tawni. I'm a 17 year old female and I'm half Indonesian and half caucasian
I love cartooning but I'm quite an amateur. Here is a cartoon I drew recently...please tell me what u think!

DEL

hi, i try to be constructive, but i probably cant help to bitch as well. ok here i go:

1. i like the different colors between the 2 fragments, trendy.
2. leaving away the ground in the 2nd is probably a good decision.
3. Shoulders of the girl, her body is way out or proportion. Her face is a bit to low too on the left picture.
4. They obviously chinese or thai, i guess.:P But cyan arms, dont know a race with cyan arms.
5. Apparently the guy made a backflip mid-air, but the lines you made dont show that:P
6. pms kills, if you mean premenstrual sympton, yes you are right. fun. :P

so overall: good amateur cartoon.

tawni

Thank you very much for your great suggestions...you really have an observant eye! I guess all one can do is practise, practise, practise! BTW those are supposed to be his feet at the top of the second frame!!!

Aran

tawni pls introduce yourself in the newbie thread. thx

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Jiwaku

I think the idea is funny. It's obvious this girl's waiting for the bus and then that dude ask what she's doing there :10900: . Putting that busstop sign in the spot was a great idea.

I dunno 'bout the colors . It just burns into my eyes. I don't mind if the anatomy isn't how it supposed to be @ all, it makes the style unique. Nice birdseyeview in the second frame

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Will the wind ever remember
The names it has blow in the past?
And with this crutch, its old age, and its wisdom
It whispers no, this will be the last
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tangawizi

I like it ! Tho I'd prefer WAP! rather than Boom! for sound effect! Keep posting more of yr stuff, Tawni!

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tawni

what do you think of the way i drew his toes in the second frame?

tangawizi

put some toenails on... and they'll be groovey :10900:

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tawni

hahaha...but those are the bottoms of his feet! LOL!

The reason i asked about the feet is because my Art teacher got really mad at me for drawing them that way

tangawizi

well, if Delano tot they were his fingers... u can see why yr art teacher got mad for misrepresentation....

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Timeless, ocean-induced moment.